It isn’t difficult to understand the role that soft toys and dolls play in the lives of children. They help facilitate pretend play, offer a safe and neutral place to act out feelings and provide sensory comforts and companionship. Play is serious business for children and is integral to their development.

But what about adults? All of my customers have been adults who collect soft toys and dolls. My dolls have been considered art dolls, but they’re still soft and fun to hold and pose, which makes them different from a totally rigid doll that you would refrain from handling.

It turns out that there are many reasons adults may collect or just occasionally buy plush toys and cloth dolls. There are many very valid reasons that soft toys can be important for adults, too.

Sensory Comforts

Many adults have one or many plush that they choose for the sensory comfort of the materials and/or the way the doll feels when held or squeezed. This is something that is unique to cloth/textile soft toys as compared to vinyl or rigid sculpture toys. The weight/squish-ability of the toy may be sufficient for some, while others may enjoy a soft toy that has multiple textures. For example, my dolls have a soft body fabric, a hair fabric in a few different textural options and may have a knitted outfit which offers an entirely different tactile experience. We tend to associate the need for sensory stimulation with autistic people, who often enjoy “stimming” or taking sensory breaks, but many other adults also benefit from this. Adults are so often expected to work and thrive in environments (such as a typical office) which are utterly devoid of sensory enrichment when, in fact, such stimuli can help us to regulate and focus. As such, I hear people on Instagram constantly talking about bringing their dolls to work and sometimes actively advocating to reduce the stigma around what are typically considered “childish” objects in “adult” settings.

Play

Adults benefit from play, too! While their play may not be as imitative or exploratory as a child’s, it still engages a different part of the brain and introduces spontaneity and joy into adult life which all too often lacks those things. “Play” for an adult may be a little less colorful than for children and may simply be putting their dolls in funny outfits or taking pictures of their collections. This may seem odd to those who can’t relate, but consider the fact that many adults collect other objects, such as shoes, cars and bags. But adults also collect other toys that have been somewhat arbitrarily elevated to a more mature status (e.g. collectible figurines or antiques). Why? Perhaps if they’re worth more money and are more fragile, we can deem them appropriate toys for adults. Why can’t adults feel equally comfortable with toys that are actually meant to be played with?

“Adults have been convinced, to our great detriment, that simply because we’ve stopped growing larger, we have stopped growing at all. But the expanse of your emotional life is never fully surveyed, and with a stuffie friend you are free to play in the uncharted space.” -Max Genecov 

Trauma and Recovery

Unique from but related to the benefit of play for adults is the topic of trauma. Many adults have experienced trauma in some form. When Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACES) occur, one consequence may be a chronic “fight or flight” state of mind.  Sadly, while play can be one of the most healing experiences for those who have experienced ACES, it’s also often overlooked as an offering to survivors in their healing journey. For adults in recovery from various childhood traumas, rediscovering toys and play which others may have had the benefit of enjoying as children can be part of the healing process. A customized handmade doll has even more potential to offer a powerful conduit to recovery. Adults in recovery from trauma may also benefit from the sensory relief as described above as a way of grounding and relaxing. For many adults who may not have had a stable home environment in which to keep and care for toys, the opportunity to pick out cherished items, with no risk of them being taken away or mistreated, may be highly comforting. A “do-over” of sorts.

Grief, loss and memory

Finally, I would be remiss if I didn’t point out the therapeutic role that dolls and plush can play in the process of grief and loss as well as issues such as Alzheimer’s. For mothers who have experienced miscarriages or who are unable to have children, dolls can be extremely comforting. For Alzheimer’s patients, dolls are often used as comforts and to trigger comforting memories. Many people will have customized plush made after the loss of a beloved pet.

All of this being said, you don’t need to have a trauma history, autism or a recent loss to rationalize your love for plush and dolls. It’s not only okay, but more common than most people realize for adults to play with dolls and plush. If you don’t believe me, simply reference (just for starters) the following information from this article: 43 percent of adults still engage with a stuffed animal. 84 percent of men, and 77 percent of women own at least one!

Further reading:

New York Times articles:

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/12/13/magazine/letter-of-recommendation-stuffed-animals.html?module=inline

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/12/20/reader-center/adults-with-stuffed-animals.html